Clarify.
During each and everyday I tend to keep to a very regular and precise routine…… Boring!!! Yes it is and for the majority of people it would more than likely be very unlikely to happen. My life as it stands is extremely boring I know but I don’t look at my life in the same way that just about everyone else does. There’s no planning for weekends or holidays or trips away or Friday and Saturday nights on romantic dates, my schedule for everyday is the same, there might be slight variations because of Suzie or an Amazon delivery but other than that it’s 99% the same. This regularity is not an issue for me, it’s a necessity because the focus in my life is purely down to one thing, that’s in my attempt to get better, to return to life, not so that I can do the things I mentioned earlier that most other people do, but so that I’m not in pain, so that I’m able actually function. So I want to clarify my post yesterday about the new regime and diet I’m doing, because everything I do, from sitting up in bed to moving from room to room and the very basic function of eating, I gauge things mentally, in my head I recall whether I was able to move my left leg forward without dragging it across those metal carpet stops and scraping the skin off my toes which bloody hurts. Yesterday was a good day in the main, yes I did get tired and yes I did struggle to get into my bedroom and bed, but it was not quite as difficult and I was able to delay it for nearly an hour. It might seem like no big deal to you but rest assured the tiny subtle differences to me were huge and reassured me that the transition from pathetic, useless and ridiculous that is my current life has started to change. My two thousand mile journey just took its first step forward.