Whoa…
That was close, so close it actually scared me because for an hour, a whole hour I was actually depressed and allowed myself to indulge in negativity. The following article is what I wrote on Friday afternoon, I was so close to posting it and declaring to the world, ok a few thousand readers. Ok I’m human, just. I felt bad, I felt negative and stated in a very matter of fact way that I’d had enough.
It was a momentary slip (an hour) but it’s not overpowered me, I’m fine, I’m back, I’m still me that will not be beaten.
One or the other…
Seriously, stop playing with me, my emotions, my life, I’m here for a purpose well that’s what I’ve engrained into my mind. I’ve continuously told myself that there is a very important reason why I got sick. Initially I thought it was because I’d been a selfish man, I honestly thought you were teaching me a lesson, y’know the you’ve been selfish so the karma thing is coming into play. Now if I’d been evil and done some terrible things then yes of course getting a hideous disease that quite frankly has ruined my life, this would be justifiable punishment, but in reality my selfishness was limited to cheating on my first wife. Does that warrant seventeen years so far of pain, frustration, humility and depression, no it doesn’t. I thought that me getting sick and the working at Huggins Applied Healing and being able to help others and show them by doing the right things and taking the right action to heal was my purpose. But that doesn’t appear to be the case.
So I’m looking at and directing this rant to you… God or the Universe or whichever is the overall governing body, make a freaking choice, stop farting around, I don’t deserve this crap, do one thing or the other, End it or Me…Do it……
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