Not easy.
Yesterday I posted that it was too easy to make adjustments, compromises or to take a break because of some justifiable reason or another, yes there are reasons as was told yesterday about Sheri’s son, please accept my apologies, your situation is very different and as I’m sure we all do, he’s in our prayers..
In my particular case, I’ve said I live alone and am lucky and very grateful to have a carer for an hour everyday to make lunch, prepare the various waters for the next day and housework etc. So I’m alone for 23 hours unless my beautiful big sister pops in, she lives 30 miles away but still makes the effort four or five times each week, I love my sister Suzie..
The mornings are best for me, I’m normally awake by 5.45 then tend to read and meditate till about 8.00. I feel good for about 4 hours until the 5 or 6 bathroom visits and getting my supplements in the kitchen wear me out. I say wear me out but what really happens is that I become totally exhausted. Manoeuvring about absolutely drains me and having the dreaded drop foot makes the effort quite dangerous for me, but the arrogant, narcissistic me refuses to give in.
In my younger years I was quite a daredevil, skydiving, scuba diving, hang gliding, mountain biking, rock climbing, plus flying small planes and riding very fast motorbikes were a major part of my life, so having multiple sclerosis has put a serious dent in who I was and what I did. It’s almost as if having multiple sclerosis is a challenge for me, this hideous and so called incurable disease to conventional doctors is daring me…. HAH, armed with the ABP and my arrogance, MS has no chance…my days are exhausting, frustrating and always a challenge….. it’s not easy, far from it but I 100% refuse to be beaten.