I’m different.
When you look at life and my particular situation then consider the average life expectancy in the UK which is 81.3 years you’d probably wonder why the heck do I bother. I mean in just over a month I’ll be sixty freaking two.. 62!!!! When I was a kid, someone 62 was a dinosaur. Then there’s the issue of me also having that disease, you know the one they consider incurable….. ha….. So knowing the average life expectancy is only 19 years away and the average for MS patients is between 5 to 10 years less that means that my life expectancy is only another 9 to 14 years, oh crap I should be seriously considering a sleeping pill cocktail.
As I said at the start of this post, I’m different….. at this time, as has been for many years I’m in pain 24/7, I sleep for about five hours each night, I have to go the loo probably 25 times each day and each visit exhausts me, there are times when I can see my left leg so I know it’s there but the bugger completely ignores my order to move, in fact my carer, a lovely woman called Sue had to physically move my leg today so I could get into the bathroom and then to get into my bed. So a normal person would be feeling quite despondent but anyone that knows me knows I’m completely opposite to normal. I don’t see a really short limited time left for me full of pain, anguish, frustration with nothing to live for, no, I see my sixties as being the best decade of my life with at least two more great decades to follow.
I’m Stefan, I’m not better than anyone else but I know I’m different.