Rather Be Healthy

Multiple sclerosis and the ABP.

I’m sure most other sufferers are in the same position as me in that we’ve had this disease for a very long time and have attempted to beat it many many times before only to be let down by what family members perceive to be just another snake oil. We’ve talked to our nearest and dearest and told them that this is different to everything you’ve personally believed and tried before, only to get the  eyebrows raised and the head tilted look and “of course it is honey” response. Inside you know this works and can feel the subtle differences yourself but those minute changes aren’t obvious to anyone not living in your skin.

Why can’t they understand, it’s obvious to you but they just can’t see it,  they’ve all done their research, they’ve read the reports initiated by the pharmaceutical industry that categorically state that this disease is incurable, and big pharma are billion dollar giants that have painstakingly spent millions and millions trying to find an answer with no joy so how on earth can little old you just do something as innocuous as change your diet and take some pills, not even drugs, but natural “supplements” but you believe healing yourself is possible….

Well it’s hard for them to comprehend that the billion dollar giants have never spent a penny on finding a cure, never!!! all they do is create a drug that eases a symptom and to a certain extent to mask the real problem. Disease in general is a cash cow for big Pharma, it’s relatively inexpensive to make a drug, provide the necessary incentives to the powers that be that enable it to be marketed, then set aside a few million for possible legal threats etc then rake in the billions in profits.

Back to your argument and justification for why you must do this and have genuine support. As I’ve said before, the differences to you are massive but not obvious to others, tell them that they are one of ten pushing a 40 ton truck, you are all pushing with all your might, it’s only moving an inch until two others join in… wow.. now it’s moving  two or three inches. Observers from a hundred yards away can’t see any difference but to the twelve pushing it, the difference was huge… you know that over the coming months another ten or twenty or thirty will join the push and then it won’t be inches it’ll be yards, it will be miles, all you have to do is stay strong mentally and persevere, ignore the naysayers, what Ann Boroch did was life changing, she did it against all odds and we will too.

Bad but good.

Is that an oxymoron….. whatever, it’s probably the best way I can describe my Wednesday, this protocol I and many others are on definitely starts in a confusing way because your mind, you know the constantly talking voice in your head is trying to come to terms with the radical changes that happen. During that first month there are as many horrible days as there are good days and the differences between the two are small and not that good, so the chatty voice in your head is regularly telling you it’s not worth it, but trust me, it is.. The good days tend to bunch together after a few weeks interspersed by a bad day, a bad day that isn’t quite as bad as the previous one. Over my first four months of following the ABP I can honestly say that after 14 years of suffering with this hideous disease, I know without a shadow of doubt that being strong of mind during the bad days has paid major dividends as the time goes by. Yes I’ve made mistakes, we all do but because getting healthy is my number one priority I’ve got up, dusted myself off, learnt from my mistakes and pushed on. I’ve written most days because it motivates and inspires me, I’ve told myself and other people I’m getting better so I’m not going to let myself down. There have been some terrible days especially in the first 10 weeks but they have become fewer and further between.

Okay, the title….. over the past week or so I’ve had lots of really good days  days bordering on great so I’m a very happy bunny, (for the non English it just means I’m very pleased).. Wednesday up to late afternoon was great but for no apparent reason to me I became weak and struggled a bit. I’m writing this at midnight on Wednesday and I can genuinely say the weakness lasted only a few hours and it was nothing like previous weak spells, so yes it was bad but overall it was good, another great day.

Being a parent and I’m sure a very large percentage of readers are, ask yourself a question…. “if your child was in danger, potentially dying, what would you do to save them”…. I imagine the answer from 99.9% is anything, and that’s only right, I know although my kids are not kids per se, they’re adults but I know there wouldn’t be a second’s hesitation to do “whatever” to save their life.

As it happens that emotion, that level, that depth of feeling is exactly how I feel about my own life, that being said I would do anything…. anything at all, I once tried bee venom therapy, being stung multiple times along each side of the spine everyday isn’t nice. But after I talked with Pat Wagner who was later known as “The bee lady” who had relieved all MS symptoms after almost 1,500 stings I was convinced it would work for me, a bee sting is painful and planning on 25 everyday for a few years definitely wasn’t something I was looking forward to, as it happens, my beekeeper friend moved out of state so bee venom therapy didn’t happen. I have had a full dental revision with one of the best dentists in the world, that was 10 5 hours of dentistry over 2 days, 3 if you count the rest day in between. In 2010 I went to Bulgaria for the CCSVI or Chronic  Cerebrospinal venous insufficiency, not nice as its an operation done while you are awake.

My point is this, I… we have a disease, the conventional doctors say is incurable but we…. you and I know that it’s not incurable, it’s just that the doctors don’t have open minds, they just believe the lies told by big Pharma who simply want to make disgusting profits by keeping the sick on drugs that treat symptoms. Whereas Ann Boroch healed herself of multiple sclerosis and you, me and anyone willing to simply eat the right foods and take the right natural supplements can do te same, it’s a damn sight easier and less painful than anything I’ve done before. It’s been 14 years, I’ve had enough pain, frustration and humiliation to last a lifetime, I’ve tried at east 50 so called potential cures, now I’m doing the right thing to heal myself, are you with me? Or maybe you just think I’m different.

If I’d had me…

Strange title for this post but don’t worry I’m not going doolally just yet, at least I don’t think so, or maybe I am as I’m talking to myself again, haha.

Anyway, when I started back in September, only four months but I’ve learned and adapted so much in that time, it seems like another life ago, this post is primarily for the newbies and Journeymen that have slipped a little over the festive and distracting period. I’m not an expert… in this so please don’t take this as advice from someone slapping your wrist, it’s only been four months but it’s Four!!! Months and on this journey it’s a lot. I don’t know, I’m getting more like Ronnie Corbett everyday, not the height thing but wandering verbally. During my first month I definitely became frustrated because I’d have a good day for me followed by a horrendous day and as a 14 year MS sufferer living alone it was hard. But I have something that not everyone has and that’s an unbreakable conviction to the ABP. If you’ve heard this before, I apologize, I’m not boasting just trying to put my challenge into perspective, in my younger life I was a skydiver, hang glider, scuba diver, mountain biker, rock climber and a pilot, okay big breath….. I was also the client service director for the world leading authority in biological dentistry and body chemistry rebalancing, so I’m no expert in the ABP but I do know a thing or two, sort of.

The protocol works but just requires one thing….. it requires you to help it to fix you, after four months, I still have a very long way to go but I know that if I keep doing the right things then I’ll keep getting closer to where I need to be. Be strong, not having the forbidden foods makes you feel massively better long term than the immediate satisfaction of eating them. When I started I could ask Janet a question and still do quite frequently, she has been amazing but from an inspirational and motivational side I didn’t have anyone writing, I know I would have got through the first two months a lot easier if I’d had me as well.

The Journey…. done right.

When I first started the Journey, capitalised because although I’ve been lucky enough to have been on more journeys than most people, this is far and away the most  important I’ve ever been on. Since September 1st when I started I think there’s probably been twenty horrible days, especially during the first 2 1/2 months, there appeared to be no rhyme or reason as to why they happened, they just did. During the last month or so, if a bad day happened, it wasn’t  for no apparent reason but specifically because I’d eaten something I shouldn’t, although it wasn’t a case of me just having it for the hell of it, no it was because I honestly thought it was okay, but I was wrong. I think during our lives we all eat or drink something just because it tastes nice but giving no regard to whether it’s good or bad for our body. As I’ve said before, the person we are is more important than being a slave to our taste buds. In my case and you if you’re on the same journey, my existence requires me to give more credence to how I intend to enable myself to live. Waking up and going to sleep at night is the start and finish if the day but t’s not a case of getting through that waking period and allowing the “must do’s” to be interspersed with pleasurable indulgences of foods and drinks that taste good. In our case it has to be clearly thought out, whatever we put into our body is doing one of two things… to a certain degree it’s either helping us to live or speeding us towards death. The past month has taught me some very, very valuable lessons, we can all get better, get healthy again if the influence on the vital decisions we make everyday are made with our logical mind not our taste buds that don’t give a damn about whether we live or die.. Wake up every morning and make a promise to yourself that your goal today is to follow the plan, priority one is to follow “The Journey……. done right”.

P.S.    This is my first post of 2018,  so following tradition…Happy New Year.xxx

Too good to indulge.

I woke quite early as is normal on Saturday morning, I hadn’t slept for more than 5 hours, again, normal, but the difference was, and an important difference was that it was my second night of not taking a sleeping pill which I’ve done for…. 30 years, so not feeling exhausted was a really good feeling. All morning I felt stronger and more stable in every way, my movement was still limited of course but I wasn’t totally exhausted after negotiating my way to the bathroom and back. The change happened minutes, literally minutes after eating my lunch, sweet potato fries which are so nice, but  I also had a gluten free lasagne which in the past has been fine, in previous months the changes have been minimal. I think because my body has been making such fantastic improvements of late, the effects of the tomato in the lasagne were so radical this time, I was feeling great, yes great one minute then while transitioning to the bathroom I changed, it was so frightening to experience. It was as if all my inner strength was sucked out of me in a two minute period. With great difficulty I made it to my bed and just rested for a few hours, I had more water with Bragg Apple cider vinegar and meditated for a few hours. When I made my way back to the living room at 3.30 I was back to my early morning condition and stayed that way for the rest of the day. My body, my inner workings know what’s good and responds accordingly, regardless of what the voice in my head tells me what’s okay in small doses or what I have to do because that’s what I’ve always done.  Saturday was a day of realisation, no more sleeping pills and no more tomato regardless of how little there is. I’m feeling too good to indulge in things that only have nice immediate and very short term pleasures..

Janet said something to me the other day that really hit home, Janet being a new friend and mentor on this challenging but ultimately rewarding journey, I started this very detailed journey to health on September first 2017 so from here on in that date will always be my New Years day. I think the majority of people on Earth celebrate the second each year passes to the next. A tradition without any real meaning, I’m not criticising others because it’s something I’d done for most of my life, or should I say for most of my healthy life. Since about 2007 a few years after I was diagnosed with MS  I’d stopped drinking because it’s hard enough moving normally so getting a little “merry” with alcohol was definitely not a good thing. The festive period doesn’t really mean anything to me now, it’s no big deal, I’m more focused on saving my life, that’s not an exaggeration, it’s true, having multiple sclerosis stops you doing most things and makes the things you can do totally exhausting. Standing up and desperately clinging to the furniture and door frames while your legs are struggling to keep you up just to get to the loo totally fatigues me big time. Living is not really living, it’s existing, so this journey is the most important journey I’ve ever been on, I don’t know exactly how long it will take to get to my destination, I don’t have a map or GPS to show me the way although I do have directions. In some ways it’s a bit like the movie “The Wizard of Oz”, follow the yellow brick road, the destination in my case is a town called Healing. So when 99% of people in the civilised world celebrate one second into Jan 1st 2018 I’ll probably be reading or watching a movie, my celebrations will always happen on September first.

But it will.

When I look at my life experiences to date, I realise that if my life ended today, which it certainly isn’t, I’d be happy to say that I have no regrets and so very much to be grateful for. I mean at the end of the day who can really say they’ve done as many exciting, rewarding and totally fulfilling things as I’ve done. This is not a boast and by doing them hasn’t made me a better person than anyone else, just different. I’ve done nearly a thousand skydives, I was a scuba diver, mountain biker, hang glider, rock climber and a pilot, I started training as a helicopter pilot. I’ve been to the lowest place in the western hemisphere, Death Valley, I’ve seen the Pyramids in Egypt, as well as visiting 23 countries around the world, I worked as a Director for the world leading authority in biological dentistry and body chemistry rebalancing. There are several other things that have taken up time and space during the 62 years I’ve been on this planet, some I’m not exactly proud of but hey.. it is what it is.

At the start of 2004 I was diagnosed with this hideous disease and I’m sure you can understand that the exciting adventures came to an end and after an incredibly fulfilling 11 years in Colorado  I returned to the not so sunny England.

So yes, I’ve been there, done that and have the Tee shirt and video, Regrets…. nah… proud.. damn right I am. But if you asked me what I was proudest of, it wouldn’t be anything I’ve listed above, no, it would be that I cured myself, I healed multiple sclerosis. Actually I couldn’t say that just now because it hasn’t happened yet, but it will.

Not important.

Christmas and New Year…… in my previous life both those days were very special as they are to most people, being with family and friends, giving and getting prezzies, seeing the smiles on those nearest and dearest is great, or should I say, it used to be great. Now it’s not, okay well now it doesn’t really apply because now is different, very, very different. To some people reading this I’m sure there will be feelings of sadness because I’m not celebrating with family or close friends, heck, I’m not celebrating with anyone, Christmas day I saw my carer Megan for 45 minutes while she prepared my lunch etc…. I talked with Mum on the phone and saw Suzie on Face time for a few minutes, both were great and much appreciated.  But hold on, please don’t misinterpret this post, this time of year for me is just “a time” they are no different from any other day of the week…. Why !!!!! because since I learned about Ann Boroch and her incredible achievement of healing herself of MS and since the 1st of September when I started on her protocol, nothing else matters. Okay I’ll clarify that, of course my mum, my sister Suzie and most of my family are of great importance to me, I love them dearly, even if most of them don’t give me a second thought. But celebrations, prezzies, indulging in food and drinks, they aren’t important, they don’t matter one iota, what does matter however, is my life….. I’ve had fourteen years of hell and several before diagnosis of confusing and painful and frustrating years. Christmas and New year are just distractions, or potential distractions, by focusing on the ABP I’m having prezzies that are way more important, way more rewarding and fulfilling everyday, not just over this period. Having the ability to stand, to get dressed, to walk, to actually go outside, which I haven’t done for a long time is Way !!!!!! more important to me. By not indulging, by not allowing things that have no real importance to distract me I will have the most important, the most significant gift…  the gift of my life….

Having MS..

If you talked about having a disease, a supposedly incurable one such as multiple sclerosis to any of the people that are reasonably healthy, I say reasonably healthy because I reckon about 20% aren’t sick per se but probably have an allergy or seasonal virus several times each year. I digress…. so if you actually explain it in depth to the average person, it’s different if they live with someone  that’s suffering or if they’re a carer, they would be shocked at the pain, discomfort, frustration and humiliation that the sufferer experiences on a daily basis. However although the normal symptoms are bad to us, me being one of them, to us it’s normal, it’s bearable, we just accept what it is and get on with it, we just deal with it, there’s no point in moaning and complaining because it doesn’t make it less painful, it doesn’t make it better, so the way I see it, is to just cope with it and keep trying to save my life.

I’m doing my best, nothing anyone can say will make this challenge any easier, unless it’s guidance from someone that’s been there and done that… about two weeks ago I tripped and fell awkwardly, I whacked my head on the edge of the coffee table and there was quite a lot of pain and blood, the last time I did that, bash my head, I was about 6 or 7 years old and fell off a 6 ft wall in Liverpool. Well this time I didn’t cry and shout for my mum, this time I just lay on the floor while Megan my carer applied pressure to the cut.

On Tuesday I had a rough afternoon,  I was very weak and struggled big time although that was diddly squat in comparison to Wednesday afternoon, this is where the extreme weakness, pain , frustration and humiliation comes into play. About 5.00 in the afternoon, I went to the loo, I have to use catheters which is frustrating, as I finished, with my pants around my knees, I became frighteningly weak, the neural pathway between my brain and legs ceased to exist. Imagine this, pants around my knees, leaning on the sink and the toilet cistern, legs splayed and refusing to move, my arms stretched and getting weaker by the second, eventually I fell twisting my arm underneath me with my neck twisted and my head pressed against the side of the bath. I lay there for a good 15 minutes, my right arm stuck underneath me, unable to move, my pants around my knees with my peachy bum for all to see, although there wasn’t anyone there.

The point of this post…. having MS is a pain yes, but my normal MS life is not bad in comparison to the odd, infrequent bad times. While I’m on this very special journey to health the bad guys are desperately trying to keep hold of what they can, they’ll do whatever they can and make such a fuss, I know I’m winning and they can shout, scream and do their worst but I’m not giving up, this is Friday morning and I’m feeling great.