So disappointed….

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Not sure

Life is strange, over the years we all have experiences and adventures and during theses periods, these times of our life we meet people and make friends, some of whom we hope they’ll play a big or significant part in our life. Well having been around on this planet for a fair length of time it would be reasonable to presume that I’d made a goodly amount of friends and lots of acquaintances, people that know me. Maybe I’m just different to most people because if I saw a person, a human being not even someone I knew well and they were asking, no, not asking but needing help, I’d help…. no question about it, no doubt, I’d help. So just to reiterate, as a caring person I’d chose to associate with like minded people, not inconsiderate selfish #### ####s, that being said I’m not sure why I’m even bothering to tell you. If you’re seeing this you will have seen my Justgiving request so you’ll understand when I say, 5 people….5 out of hundreds have helped, I’m embarrassed and so disappointed.

https://www.justgiving.com/crowdfunding/stefan-cairns

www.twitter.com/ratherbehealthy

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I wonder why..

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Why…

I ask myself that question everyday, I ask myself “what’s the point”, why do I try my hardest to fool everyone that knows me, everyone that knows of me through social media and my blog, why do I tell myself at least a hundred times everyday that I’m getting better. The sad fact is that this hideous unrelenting disease is slowly but surely kicking my butt. By the end of my day or the twelve hours I’m not in my bed, I’m shattered, it’s so, so difficult to move about, I cling desperately to the door frame trying to get to my bed but my legs refuse to move then all of my strength disappears and I collapse on the floor hoping I don’t twist my knees or break my leg.

In some ways it’s exactly as all the medical professionals I’ve seen over the last 17 years have told me that I have multiple sclerosis, an incurable disease that about three million other people around the world have. They tell me I will just keep getting weaker and weaker and sicker and sicker, but I don’t believe them….

I’ll tell you why…..because I’m me, I’m Stefan and no freaking disease is going to smugly sneer at me and say “that’s one more” and think it’s taken another life because I’m not like 99.9% of other people, I will not give up after being told that there’s no hope.

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The truth…

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The Truth

Looking back on my life thus far, I can say it’s been an incredible journey to have been blessed with some amazing experiences. The tough upbringing in Liverpool during the 50’s, 60’s and 70’s taught me a lot about life. Being a Boy Soldier was hard, but good in that just learning how to interact and work as a team was so important. I suppose working in the I.T. industry for 30 years, primarily in sales and sales management added another very useful lesson that would assist me at some point along my life’s adventure. Working in a different country as I know several others of you know about is challenging, then my years with Dr Huggins was truly amazing. I’ve made lots of “friends” during the past sixty years and thousands of “acquaintances” and I’ve learned so many lessons by knowing them. But something I didn’t know is that when you are healthy and full of life, all your “friends” know who you are, but when you aren’t healthy you know who your “friends” are, Dottie, Shari, Claire, George and Steve, thank you my friends, and the rest of the fair weather friends and family, thanks for nothing.

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Why I will…

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I’m sure that to some people the way I’ve addressed the struggle I’m in probably seems strange, I mean here I am constantly writing  about the things I learned while working for the great Dr Hal Huggins or about my current health challenges. Yes i was officially diagnosed with MS in Feb 04, I say officially because I’d had the early symptoms for four years but the “doctors” apparently thought it was just a minor thyroid issue. Anyway  after being diagnosed I refused to take the prescribed drugs. I’m not sure if everybody understands that 99% of allopathic doctors have been brainwashed by the pharmaceutical giants into addressing and alleviating the symptoms of a disease or illness. So during the early years I only took a nutritional beverage called XanGo, in reality I was able to keep the majority of symptoms at bay and for that I will always be grateful. Studying with Dr Huggins I was fortunate to learn of and meet some incredible people in the world of natural healing, Having a better understanding of how the human body works and its method of informing you of problems that in the main are being created by foods, drinks and substances you are putting into your body changed my life. A book written by Dr Huggins, “Uninformed Consent” goes to great length to explain this sad fact.  Anyway, using the knowledge I gained and consistent research I’ve continued to attempt to beat this disease, I’m not interested in simply addressing and easing the symptoms, a disease, a hideous unrelenting disease has taken up residence in me and I’m not happy about it, I’m never going to give in as the brainwashed medical experts suggest.  Everyday I take natural supplements in an aim to correct the imbalances in y body chemistry, I meditate, I pray, I constantly tell myself that I am getting better and better and better. I honestly believe that I will succeed using the power of my mind, my faith and unfailing determination, this is why I will win.

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If you’d like to help me as I am now disabled and operate this site on my own then please consider donating, you can do this by going to www.paypal.com then click on Send money.

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What I’m doing…

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What I’m doing.

My life is a never ending puzzle, it’s a bit like living a “Groundhog Day” life. Not as in just experiencing the same day as the previous one because, yes that would be a tad frustrating, but it’s more confusing and frustrating than that. Ok, imagine that you personally knew you had a serious health problem but you honestly believe that you were doing the right things and slowly but surely you were eating into it every second by doing the complete opposite of what the medical experts had recommended. By the end of the day you had meticulously followed what you believe to be the correct regimen and you could feel the progress you are making in a very positive way. Then the next morning you wake up and can feel in every muscle in your body that the elation you had experienced at the end of the previous day had disappeared, it’s as if nothing you had done actually happened so you just have to start again. So if in your heart of hearts you know that the problem can be beaten, but what you are doing each day helps get through the day as painful as it is but it only has a temporary effect. The good thing is that the disease is definitely being slowed down, by rights if I’d not been doing what I’ve done over the last fourteen years I’d be in a lot worse condition, I’d probably be bed ridden needing care 24/7 and not wanting to live. But I know I’m close, I know the long lasting forever solution is there, at my fingertips, it might be Stem Cell treatment and from what I’ve read, this isn’t just anecdotal evidence, it’s real and happening for thousands of others that have been suffering with this hideous disease. The frustration and confusion I experience every day of my life could come to an end, it Will come to an end, I just need to stay strong and determined and not let it beat me when I’m so close to the finishing line.

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What I learned….

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I have struggled today, not from a health point of view but struggled to come to terms with what I learned today. I suppose my view and understanding of life is very different from that of most other people. I’m not saying my opinion of humanity is the right view, maybe it’s been formed over many years of seeing and experiencing things most people haven’t. I’ve met some beautiful people that regardless of their own physical, financial or emotional difficulties have persevered to do good and honourable things. I believe in doing good whenever possible and to help those in need, as I’ve said before I know my own personal situation is bad and I’ve struggled for a decade and more. But there are many, many others in far worse situations than me so I count my blessings and am so grateful. It would be great if everyone could be helped, I realise that’s never going to happen, but as the boy who was told when throwing the beached starfish back into the ocean that there was hundreds and he couldn’t make a big difference but he said it made a difference to the ones he threw back. I or you can’t help everyone but you could help me..

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Not an “If”…

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Most days I write about how my day is progressing in relation to my struggle or about a health topic in general, it seems that there is some level of interest simply because of the number of viewers my blog gets. It’s difficult in many ways just to live but as I’ve said on numerous occasions, my situation is bad but certainly not the worst and because I know that in my heart that I have all I need to exist, I’m ok with it. Do I want to be able to do all the “normal” things in life, absolutely!!!! I suppose if I look at my life from an outside perspective it would probably look like a pathetic existence, spending half of my day in bed and the other half sat on the sofa, oh yes I go to the loo as well, so bedroom, living room and bathroom is my day. It’s boring but I know this is a temporary period of my life, the getting healthy and wealthy is definitely not an “if” it’s a “When”….

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JustGiving…

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Just giving

https://www.justgiving.com/crowdfunding/stefan-cairns

In life we are all faced with challenges and obstacles, some are minor and unfortunately some are big. Obviously the small ones are usually easy to deal with although the big obstacles can be stressful and very difficult to deal with. But these are things we all would do anything to rectify or overcome, in reality you’d do anything to save your child, you’d take a bullet or jump in front of a speeding train. Imagine this my skydiving friends that you deploy your main and it malfunctions, do you just say “oh bugger, it looks like I’m going in” or do you calmly deploy your reserve. My analogy here is that just because the doctors said I was going to die a slow and humiliating and painful death, I don’t accept it. I am and will do whatever is a viable option, a potential cure is out there. Stem cell treatment is having incredible results all over the world and that’s what I intend to do. Am I worth a coffee and a brownie at Starbucks to you? I hope so, instead of buying a coffee please donate to my Justgiving fund, obviously I need to raise a lot of money but anything you can spare will help and i’m so grateful.

Http://www.justifying.com/crowdfunding/stefan-cairns.

 

They should be….

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They should be.

To the majority of people in the world having an excellent medical service is extremely important, if you look at the advertising and the media in general it would seem like having medical facilities and that includes the provision of the necessary medicines, drugs and vaccines is of paramount importance. So that being the case and knowing that the USA has without doubt more hospital beds than any four European countries combined and the most pharmaceutical companies in the world you’d think that Americans would be the healthiest people. The Pharmaceutical industry is only second to Oil and Gas as the most profitable, as a nation the USA count for about 5% of the world population and 90% of the drugs manufactured worldwide are taken by American people,  hmmmm. According to the Bloomberg ranking of the world’s healthiest nations, the USA is 33rd meaning that 32 other countries have people that live longer and healthier lives which doesn’t say much for cramming drugs into your body does it, oh and by the way the UK was 21st.  Singapore was 1st then Iceland, Italy and Australia.

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On reflection….

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On reflection.

I’ve had some time to reflect on my post yesterday, I realise that me saying what I did probably sounded like I’m going a little “doolally” to most people, I imagine there are thoughts like “poor Stefan, he’s completely lost it”. I can understand it if that’s what you thought when you read it, I mean here I am, with this supposedly incurable disease and getting by on disability benefits and making claims that it’s all going to change for the better. Yes it does seem like a far fetched clinging onto life wish. But…..But that’s not the case, as I said I have absolute faith, complete confidence that what I’m saying is true and some of you, not all but some will be totally shocked and very pleasantly surprised.

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